I have been really struggling with this prosperity gospel, on one hand, The Lord will supply all my needs, so to live on the brink of poor is Christlike. And is always a struggle monthly just to get by.
ON THE OTHER HAND, A part of me wants to launch out in faith and say LORD I AM THE HEAD AND NOT THE TAIL, I WILL LEND TO AND NOT BORROW FROM, ALWAYS ASKING FOR THINGS THAT I NEED AND I MEAN NEED, I want to take my family on holiday, I want to take them fishing, I want my wife to lack nothing, I want to be able to buy a house, I want my child to go to a good school….So then I end up being depressed.
And wondering if I love mammon over the lord…there are so many teachings out there, some to extreme towards either side. That I find my self double-minded.